Healing isn’t a one-and-done affair after abuse

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Healing takes time, patience, forgiveness and at the right time for you.

When clients ask me how long it will take for them to heal, I don’t have an answer for them, because everybody’s healing journey is different. Mine has taken 5 years so far and I am still healing, still discovering new things about myself because now it is safe for me to discover them.

Ask yourself what being healed would feel like to you. Does it feel like safety? Does it feel like freedom? When you close your eyes and visualise yourself as a healed and whole being, where are you? Who are you with? What are you doing? What small steps can you take today to lead you on your journey to feeling healed?

There are many forms of self-reflection you can do that can help with visualising where you would like to be, what you would like to feel and often, at the start of your healing journey it can feel like an impossible task. Start small, take small steps and see where they lead you.

  1. Surround yourself with people who will actively advocate for your healing, anyone who is blocking your path, create some distance from them by protecting your time and putting in boundaries
  2. Use visualisation – try meditating, journaling, create a vision board of things that speak to your soul
  3. Ask yourself what small steps you can take today, maybe some self-care to calm your nervous system and give yourself some headspace to figure out what direction you would like your journey to start in
  4. Go out into nature, yes it’s cold and a bit dismal but connecting with nature is a proven method of reducing stress and anxiety, quieting the mind and allowing for mental headspace. Try grounding exercises whilst walking or standing still in nature – listen to the sounds of nature, smell the trees / the ocean / the earth, feel your feet on the floor and position yourself firmly in time and space
  5. Don’t compare your healing journey to others. It is yours and yours alone. Do it your way and take small steps. If you want to change the course of your journey you can, YOU are in control

When you discover new things about yourself, try not to shy away from them, after being in an abusive relationship you can lose who you are, and you may discover you are not who you were before, I know I’m not. What I am, though, is ready to take on the next steps in my healing journey and if you are ready, I would love to be alongside you. Use the contact form to drop me a message and arrange your free discovery call today.

~ Lisa

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