I recently shared a reel of my little dog on my social media pages. She is getting old now, over nine years old, and although she is not showing any sign getting less crazy, she is getting grey in the face, sometimes misses the mark when jumping up onto the sofa and has fewer teeth with each passing year and it got me thinking about pet bereavement.

She is our first dog. I temporarily acquired another dog a few years ago, belonging to my partner at the time, and although he wasn’t my dog, I loved him dearly. He died young, at only five years old, and he left a massive St. Bernard-shaped hole in our lives.

When we lose a pet, it is never just a dog or just a cat, or any other kind of pet. They become a part of our family; we often have them in our lives for a long time, and they provide untold comfort, companionship, and joy. The loss we suffer is a real bereavement, and as such, we need to heal from it. Some will seek to replace that companionship quickly; others can never envisage having a pet again, afraid of the heartache that will inevitably follow. How we deal with bereavement is entirely unique to us, and nobody can tell us how we *should* deal with it.

Bereavement is hard. There are models that try to define the stages we go through, and whilst they might be helpful for professionals when dealing with bereavement, they are not necessarily set in stone. Bereavement can come in cycles, waves, in a different order to the step or stage models popularly touted. There is no set time limit on bereavement; it is different for everybody.

What is certain is that the loss of anything loved, whether a pet, a loved one, a relationship, an estrangement from a family member, a career, mobility, motor function, or anything, can feel devastating. The good news is that talking can help you grow around your grief and move forward.

Talking to people you trust, journaling your thoughts and feelings, speaking to a counsellor or psychotherapist when the feelings become too overwhelming. It is natural to have regrets, even guilt, when we lose someone or something we love and working through those emotions can have a positive impact on moving forward with your life.

If you have thoughts or feelings associated with grief that you would like some help with, get in touch.

~ Lisa